found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize