it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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