With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
