My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
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