Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry repitripit hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(906): View more from Michigan

I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.

Fav 25 7130 1697
share tweet
(661): View more from California

I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.

Fav 9 4274 1069
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(510): View more from California

God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.

Fav 9 3247 1119
share tweet
(480): View more from Arizona

Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.

Fav 8 2237 865
share tweet
(805): View more from California

Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate

Fav 5 2257 829
share tweet
(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"

Fav 4 608 1331
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(570): View more from Pennsylvania

You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?

Fav 9 1149 882
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(413): View more from Massachusetts

did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?

Fav 3 536 201
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(336): View more from North Carolina

I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.

(1-336): View more from North Carolina

Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.

(336): View more from North Carolina

Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.

Fav 0 456 589
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT