Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
