Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
