If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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