so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
