singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Randomize
