Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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