then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
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