Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
