don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
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