Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
The adults are the big ones right?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
