dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Fuck appropriateness.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
