Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Is it penis luge time yet?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
