My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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