Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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