seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
