Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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