What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
