god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize