I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Be still, my beating vagina.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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