wat bout pragnant strippers??
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
