i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
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