Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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