It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
