just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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