did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
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