i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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