Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
