"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Randomize
