the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
