idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize