you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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