My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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