Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
