puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
