oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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