she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
