i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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