Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
