I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize