do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize
