Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize