How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
