So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Randomize
