Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
