is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
