If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Randomize
